I have so many thoughts going through my mind. Its nice to have a spot to come and dump it all out. Not for the drama, but for the growth that comes with sharing and getting things out. Even if no one were to ever reads this, it is therapeutic to get out. I think that is why I feel the need to catch up on my scrapbook so bad. No matter what my happen to me, I want my kids to always remember how much I love being their mom and what a joy they are to me.
I hate being misunderstood. I miss being able to confide in someone and having them understand and empathize with me, completely. Even if they may not agree with me.
I had a very ruff day on Friday. My Awesome nephew Jefferson who is serving a mission mentioned how he has learned to not just pray TO God but to pray WITH God. I've been really trying to change that and have better conversations with him. After pouring my heart in prayer, Heavenly Father was busy sending mercies my way. Minutes later I received a knock at my door and some beautiful flowers from an unknown giver. {I'm positive it was my visiting teachers} Then minutest after that one of my kindred spirit friends, happened to just drop in to say hello. We had the sweetest conversation, and she was able to comfort me with something as simple as a true friendship. The advice and wisdom she shared with me was just what I needed to hear. I look up to and admire her so much. She has no clue I'm sure just what her visit did for me. I also had a fun conversation with my sister on the phone. They always lift me up.
One thing I know for sure is that my Heavenly Father is very much aware of me. He truly knows the intent on my actions. That I don't mean to offend. Especially those whom I adore. He knows what I can handle even if I am not yet convinced. I am trying to really strengthen my relationship with him, and learn to trust in His plan, no matter what.
Of all the feeling and struggles I have been going through, she has been my little ray of sunshine. She (along with my other kids) is a constant reminder of all that is good in my life.
I adore this little girl!!!
I love my family. Adore my husband. Am grateful for a beautiful home, Have the best Mom on the planet and feel loved by my Heavenly Father.
My life is full. Not perfect and its a little scary the things that are out of my control, but it is very very good. I am blessed!
